Monday, February 8, 2010

teenage dirtbag

I hate being mad at people I love. then I don't want to tell them I am mad, but I know that I should because I love them and they love me so they would want to fix it. but then I feel badly. I don't want them to know that they hurt me because that might hurt them. then it's just a vicious cycle of hurt. I don't like hurt. but I am very hurt. and sad. I wish this had just worked out for me. I know it never could have, but why does it have to be because of her? and why doesn't she realize that? and why doesn't she realize that because I love her so much, it hurts that she's the reason why I hurt.
I'm glad it didn't work though.
no I'm not.
but it's for the best. at least that's what I want to think.

apparently lesbians like me. maybe I should just do that. although that might be rude and insulting to actual lesbians. I bet that would throw everyone for a loop, though. I like not being predictable. except, by saying this it makes it predictable and less out of left field. whoops.



I wish I was magnetic.

1 comment:

  1. that is my dilemma too. vicious cycles should not be allowed to exist.

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